Thursday, August 25, 2011

The Mindset List For The Class Of 2015

Came Anonymously…

Andre the Giant, River Phoenix, Frank Zappa, Arthur Ashe and the Commodore 64 have always been dead. Their classmates could include Taylor Momsen, Angus Jones, Howard Stern's daughter Ashley, and the Dilley Sextuplets.

 

1.      There has always been an Internet ramp onto the information highway.

2.      Ferris Bueller and Sloane Peterson could be their parents.

3.      The only significant labor disputes in their lifetimes have been in major league sports.

4.      There have always been at least two women on the Supreme Court, and women have always commanded U.S. Navy ships.

5.      They "swipe" cards, not merchandise.

6.      "Don't touch that dial!"...what dial?

7.      More Americans have always traveled to Latin America than to Europe.

8.      Amazon has never been just a river in South America.

9.      Refer to LBJ, and they might assume you're talking about LeBron James.

10.   All their lives, Whitney Houston has always been declaring "I Will Always Love You."

11.   O.J. Simpson has always been looking for the killers of Nicole Simpson and Ronald Goldman.

12.   Women have never been too old to have children.

13.   We have never asked, and they have never had to tell.

14.   20. Life has always been like a box of chocolates.

15.   John Wayne Bobbitt has always slept with one eye open.

16.   "Yadda, yadda, yadda" has always come in handy to make long stories short.

17.   Video games have always had ratings.

18.   Chicken soup has always been soul food.

19.   The Rocky Horror Picture Show has always been available on TV.

20.   Jimmy Carter has always been a smiling elderly man who shows up on TV to promote fair elections and disaster relief.

21.   Arnold Palmer has always been a drink.

22.   Dial-up is soooooooooo last century!

23.   Their older siblings have told them about the days when Britney Spears, Justin Timberlake and Christina Aguilera were Mouseketeers.

24.   Fake Christmas trees have always outsold real ones.

25.   They've always been able to dismiss boring old ideas with "been there, done that, gotten the T-shirt."

26.   Music has always been available via free downloads.

27.   Grown-ups have always been arguing about health care policy.

28.   Moderate amounts of red wine and baby aspirin have always been thought good for the heart.

29.   Sears has never sold anything out of a Big Book that could also serve as a doorstop.

30.   Electric cars have always been humming in relative silence on the road.

31.   Russian courts have always had juries.

32.   No state has ever failed to observe Martin Luther King Day.

33.   While they've been playing outside, their parents have always worried about nasty new bugs borne by birds and mosquitoes.

34.   Fidel Castro's daughter and granddaughter have always lived in the United States.

35.   Charter schools have always been an alternative.

36.   The New Kids on the Block have always been known as NKOTB.

37.   They've always wanted to be like Shaq or Kobe: Michael Who?

38.   They've often broken up with their significant others via texting, Facebook, or MySpace.

39.   Their parents sort of remember Woolworths as this store that used to be downtown.

40.   Kim Jong-il has always been bluffing, but the West has always had to take him seriously.

41.   Frasier, Sam, Woody and Rebecca have never Cheerfully frequented a bar in Boston during primetime.

42.   Major League Baseball has never had fewer than three divisions and never lacked a wild card entry in the playoffs.

43.   They won't go near a retailer that lacks a website.

44.   Altar girls have never been a big deal.

45.   When they were 3, their parents may have battled other parents in toy stores to buy them a Tickle Me Elmo while they lasted.

46.   Refugees and prisoners have always been housed by the U.S. government at Guantanamo.

47.   Women have always been Venusians; men, Martians.

48.   McDonalds coffee has always been just a little too hot to handle.

49.   "PC" has come to mean Personal Computer, not Political Correctness.

50.   The New York Times and the Boston Globe have never been rival newspapers.

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